Update.

     Well it's a new year and lately I have been feeling a little distant from the rest of the world. It feels as if I have to take a step back reexamine friends, relationships, my work, my happiness and overall progress as a whole. It's funny how people say new year, new attitude because now it seems I have to reintroduce myself to those who I have known for years. Even the ones I have known for shorter amounts of time have turned the tides on me. Was I blind all of last year? Do I just ignore the big change? And then it hits me. Why am I so concerned and caring about those who don't give two shits about me? Let's just call it my "Aha moment".

     As far as friends are concerned I have always felt light years ahead of my peers; more so when it comes down to my maturity level. I love my friends and I'm thankful for those I know will always be there. You can not call everyone your friend. It's always better to have one good friend than to have a lot of sharks in your tank. As for my personal relationships...well they have become headaches and although you can not control who you love you can control who you sleep with. I'm just saying.
 
     I'm ready to quit my job and start something new. Hey, it's a new year right? I'm willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for my happiness. It's time to take control of what I want and more so, what I deserve. This is not just a new year... it's my life. It's in God's hands. The horse blinders are off, so are the gloves and everything else. I'm ready to take Renard to a new level of existence.  

That's just where I am today,

- Renard

Hello 2012...

I hope everyone has had a very merry Christmas and I wish everyone a prosperous year.

     The year of 2011 has been a roller coaster ride for me and I'm glad it has finally came to an end. I've made it over the hill and survived all of the twists and turns and I'm grateful to still be here... To live to see another day. The holiday season is all about the celebration of life. When the clock strikes midnight marking the end of a year; everything comes full circle.

     Everything that has happened in 2011 simply becomes a thing of the past. Time to start anew... time to create new memories and celebrate being alive. Whether you watch the ball drop live in Times Square or watched it live in the comfort of your own home we all know that the dropping of the ball symbolizes hope for a better tomorrow and the rebirth of mankind.

     As we bid farewell to 2011 I couldn't help but think of all that I have accomplished and what great things lie ahead. Know that you can make a difference in someones life. Know that you are beautifully human and most importantly, know that you are loved. Take a deep breath and breathe new life into 2012.

Until tomorrow comes, take care for now.

- Renard

The Past..Present...and the Unknown

Over the past year I have found peace and acceptance within myself. I have prayed for a complete makeover and boy was I in for a HUGE wake up call. Those around me have showed me their true colors. Love was lost then found...then lost again. There's really no such thing as a fairytale ending. You have to make a change for yourself.. and it starts with you. Those close to me.. my family have become my bitter enemies and friendships have grown stronger than ever. I thank the big guy upstairs for opening my eyes and allowing me to see that "hey, not everyone's gonna like Renard".. that's life.


As far as love is concerned I was blinded by a sweet personality and insecurities that I wasn't ready to face yet. I fell in love in October and out of it by March. The biggest issue was communication and understanding. I play by my rules and he played by his. But what can I say...I'm selfish. That's just me.



I have since faced certain things and have overcome obstacles that have stood in my way of complete happiness. Do I regret anything that has happened thus far.. hmmm maybe.. Am I completely satisfied with life right now.. Hell NO. But it gets better, I know it does. And what can I say about the future other than the fact that I can close my eyes before I go to sleep and pray for a better tomorrow.

Until tomorrow comes, take care for now.

Renard

Welcome 2010

Well I'm simply speechless. Its 2010 and I think back on a time where I was a naive child not giving any thought to the future. Whether it was 5 minutes into the future or 10 years; I never thought about it. Well its here and I welcome it with open arms. I don't want to recount 2009 and the events that happened but some things remain unforgettable. Right now I'm sitting and watching mTV wondering how people can actually watch this b.s. and be happy to bring in the new year in the freezing cold. Not to mention its also raining here in MD and there in NYC. But different strokes for different folks.

So here I am, nice and warm, kicking back with a breezer thinking about things that I could do differently when in all honesty I HATE NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS! I guess its all the talk I don't like. I much rather go out and do it. So here is what I AM GOING TO DO IN 2010: Get a new car. What? I bet you thought it was going to be a long list. It's not. Tonight, like every New Years Eve there seems to be something special in the air. Something so liberating and cleansing that takes over your mind, body and soul... Or it might just be the alcohol for some. But whatever you do to celebrate the new year; today, January 1st 2010 marks a new beginning for so many of us.

Since I'm not of age I'm not with the rest of my associates partying it up. But next year. VEGAS BABY!!!!! So whether you party it up or enjoy a cozy *safe* night indoors I would like to wish you a Happy New Year from me to you. My best friend didn't even call me to wish me happy new year. No txt or anything. Just silence. But silence is golden. Watching the world premiere of Jay-Z's "On to the Next One" and just thinking "oh shit, this is the way to bring in the New year!" Hmm..hidden messages. I love em! Time to clean out the closet once again. This year will be 10x's better! Get it? Got it? GOOD.

*ON TO THE NEXT ONE* like Jay Baby!

~Kendrick

The end...but only the begining

So another year is ending and it seems as if 2009 was not only action packed but also extremely short as most times are. Christmas has just passed and all the tinsel, lights and holiday spirit couldn't brighten my outlook on the season. I felt numb. I really don't like holidays because it causes the majority of us to change how we are for one day such as being filled with joy (yea right) and spending over your limit. Anyway, the only thing I like about the whole Xmas season are the sales. You can clean up on Black Friday or wait until my favorite sale... The Winter Clearance sale which usually takes place right after Christmas to give those of you who spent regular price on the same items a big slap in the face.

Lets wrap things up...in 2009 we lost "The King of Pop" a "Charlies Angel" and my girl "TY" (see Clueless). Rihanna destroyed C. Breezy after being manhandled earlier this year. We learned that "Beyonce has one of the Best Videos of All Time... OF ALL TIME!" (Thank you Kanye) and that being a Ho isn't such a bad thing. I mean look at how far Kimmy Kakes, Amber Rose and Cheetah Woods' hoes have gone. I'm not mad...they do what they gotta do! All in all I have had a pretty productive year with traveling and taking steps to be where I want to be. I can taste it. No New Years Resolution for me... I rather salute the year 2009 with two middle fingers high in the air and let it go sit in the corner and think about what it has done. BTW Love you GAGA! Keep it up.

See you next year...

~Kendrick